I’ve just finished reading Broken Open – How Difficult times Can Help Us Grow, by Elizabeth Lesser, a co-founder of the Omega Institute – the world’s largest center for spiritual retreat and personal growth. The book is a collection of stories about people going through change and transformation arising out of those deep and painful times.
Broken Open came into my hands just in time. I’d received a copy of my sister Louise Nayer’s soon to be published memoir, Burned, about our early and difficult childhood. It’s been a very emotional experience for me and I’ve been happy to have Broken Open to help me stay awake during a difficult time.
“Fiasco and failure visit each one of us, as if they were written into the job description of being human. I’ve seen people crumble in times of trouble lose their spirit, and never fully recover. I have seen others protect themselves fiercely from any kind of change, until they are living a half life, safe yet stunted.” – Elizabeth Lesser
There’s a third way to deal with fearful change and painful loss, which she calls The Phoenix Process, named for the mythical bird who remains awake through the fires of change, rises from the ashes of death and is reborn into his most vibrant and enlightened self.
That’s what I’m after! I want to rise from the river of tears that have been unleashed, looking back. We have all gone through change and have been very afraid. We have all experienced the loss of a loved one, a job, a relationship, a pet, a home. We have drowned in tears and sucked it up and carried on as if nothing happened.
This time around, I want to do something different so I’m going to see my sister’s book as an opportunity to put the phoenix process into action in my life.
As I read about myself as a child I know that I could say, ” water under the bridge, everything worked out, stop crying” and not dig deeper and finally feel those painful feelings. I can see how not feeling them has kept me stuck.
I’m excited. I feel like the phoenix process will open my heart, make me more expansive, fuller, better able to be there for myself and others – with love.
I’ll keep you posted and appreciate your comments.
