For the past month, I’ve been playing The Prosperity Game with three women mastermind partners. Since we live in far flung places, we  gather via email to support each other and raise our prosperity vibrations.

The Prosperity game is designed to expand your ability to receive and spend money in joyful ways; to improve your relationship with the energy of money and to become a vibrational match for prosperity by feeling like someone who is already prosperous.

Rules of the Game: On day one you receive $1000(virtual money), spend it all and account for it. On day 2 you receive $2000 and do the same and so on for 30 days when you receive $30,000. Over the course of the month you receive and spend $465,000. Our group emailed daily expenditures. When I do it on my own I have a chart to keep track of money in and money out.

It’s been fun and very enlightening.  It might be too woo woo for some and a bit weird like playing with an imaginary friend, but I keep learning and I feel more and more how it actually works.  I can see my money patterns and am  healing some of my dysfunctional relationship with money and widening the channels to to whole-hearted giving and receiving.

We all tithe right off the top and by now, have set up foundations and trusts to help others and then we veer off and do our own thing, expressing ourselves by how we spend our money. The choices range from swing sets, skydiving, custom made shoes, spas and cruises to paying bills, buying new horses, plane tickets, massages, gifts to family, house repairs, travel, education, limos, gardeners and on and on and then, for me anyway, I started to run out of stuff to want. I had a top of the line vitamix blender and a new paddle board and, to be honest, because I’d been emailing my accounting of how I’d spent my money so I couldn’t always remember if I’d already bought one of those…. Like in my real life where I unearthed 4 digital recorders – none of which I had ever successfully mastered.

I don’t long for a yacht, a private jet or a mansion, preferring simple, low maintenance and charming. I spend my money fixing up my house, building an apartment, helping family, starting a puppet theater, new paddle board, travel, gardening, treating people, paying all my bills for years, a sailing dinghy and much more until  it become a chore  I decided (virtually) to hire a like minded financial adviser who would invest it in businesses with integrity, that I believe in and that make money – to support me and more to allow me to make a difference in the lives of others and of the earth.  My underlying goal was to be financially free and not to have to think about money while always have it available for my relatively simple lifestyle.

One of the mastermind partners said the game made her feel uncomfortable – it was just too much money to deal with so she was going to play another game where the money was more what she was used and she could get back to feeling good while spending and receiving (the point of the game).

Another achieved her initial goal of finding a job – for real. Another found that the game was raising her prosperity consciousness and she was reaping the rewards in her non virtual life and feeling good about giving and receiving on a bigger scale and in ways other than money.  I’m in the middle aiming for the expanded version and getting closer each day.

Where are you? Are you a vibrational match for prosperity?

Money Talks.

When a friend asked if I was going to take over both of my cottages when my tenant moves out  I answered with a resounding YES. Individually the cottages make two good-sized studio’s – one with kitchen and one without. Together they constitute a lovely two pod home.

I have never occupied the entire ‘house’ (i.e. both cottages) in the 6 years I’ve lived here.  My daughter  lived in one of them for the first couple of years and it stayed her space as she came and went from school until I went sailing and sublet the whole house,

I smiled as I pictured expanding into the additional space and wondered if I’d grow bigger as I transitioned to a bigger tank, or, in this case, a bigger living space..

Not only would my ‘stuff’ ooze from one cottage to the other, but I myself might grow into my larger, more elegant, villa and expand into the kind of person who lives in a wonderfully magical, spacious, colorful, well equipped, comfortable, artfully decorated tropical home; the kind of person who grows into her new queen sized bed, leaving her day bed for lounging and guests. Like Alice in Wonderland, I might go to sleep at 5’ tall and 92 pounds and wake up 5’8 and 160!

Something was stuck in my mind about aquarium fish that get bigger if they are put in a bigger tank so I did some research and discovered that the size of the tank the fish is kept in is a determining factor on whether it grows to its full potential size or is somewhat smaller. It’s not that that fish will keep growing past their genetic program,  just that if you keep it in a too small space it will fail to reach it’s full size – or full potential.

In an average 10 gallon tank, if well cared for and not crowded, goldfish can grow up to about 4 inches (10 cm), while in a larger uncrowded tank they can grow larger, generally reaching about 7 or 8 inches (17.78 – 20.32 cm). If kept in a spacious pond they can reach over 12 inches (30+ cm), with some hobbyist reporting their common goldfish reaching up to a whopping 18″ (45+ cm)!

I wouldn’t want to be a goldfish in a 10 gallon tank, condemned to a stunted half size when I could be reaching my full gold-fish potential in a pond.

Here was a new perspective on expanding into my cottages or maybe into your getting a promotion at work, moving into a bigger office because you’re straining at the walls your cubicle, outgrowing your current job description at home and or/at work and it made me think about when I was a kid  allowed to range further and further from our apartment.  Like a goldfish, I kept getting bigger as the tank of my world expanded,  literally and in confidence, in new experiences and a bigger vision as I ventured forth from my housing project into the new, bigger space of the city.

My mother bought clothes for me with ‘room to grow” and I did  the same for my daughter.  As adults we may keep our skinny clothes and our bigger jeans, but we tend to arrive at a size when we reach our full genetically programed, environmentally nourished physical stature.  We continue growing so many other respects: our minds,  emotional lives,  knowledge,  skills, spirituality and so much more. If we get stuck in a too small tank we stop growing and and risk staying “too small” ourselves.

I thought that gold fish were supposed to be small and live in a small tank. I wonder if I think the same about people – accept their stunted states for full grown. Maybe they could be so much more – swishing their tails in big ponds, double the size.

What about you?  Are you in a too tight space in some area of your life?  How might you expand into a bigger picture, rise to the occasion, move outside of the box, take off a too tight shoe? What clothes have been in closet of your imagination that are waiting for you to grow into them – whether it’s the business suit, the wedding gown, the judges gown, the slinky dance outfit or the beach bum cut-offs?

Here’s to expanding into uncharted territory inside and out.  See you in the pond.

I read the words of Swami Sivananda next to a photo of a man meditating on a mountain top: “Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success.”

The meditating man demonstrated focus, doing one thing and doing it with his whole heart, mind and soul, but when I thought of small acts, I pictured washing the dishes, petting the dog, changing the car oil and weeding the garden – activities of daily living, some shared and others  reflecting our unique preferences and differences.

Sivananda’s words go right to the heart of what I’ve been thinking lately and what underlies a new minimalist approach I’ve been using with coaching clients and with myself.  Focusing on one small aspect of life and getting it right so it feels true, lined up, unobstructed, satisfying and joyful, is all that is really needed for everything else to work too. When we focus with our whole heart, mind and soul on even our smallest acts, the ripple effect takes care of the rest – inside and out.

I have a client who is focusing on nourishing herself: on menus, food shopping, preparing and eating in a healthful way. She says that the more she gets this aspect of her life flowing easily, the better she feels, the more energy she has and, what’s more, everything else seems to fall into place easily.

Another client is focused on creating a great morning experience for herself – stretching, eating a good breakfast, thinking positive thoughts, setting an intention for the day – and then noticing the impact that new focus has on the day ahead. She is relieved  any of the weighty subjects that fill her thoughts. All she has to do is  create a great morning experience for herself. She’s having fun and ‘get’s that how she begins her day predicts how the rest of it will unfold.

We are overwhelmed with long to-do lists that weigh heavily on us.  In addition to the undone stuff, there are the unfulfilled dreams, the unrealized potential, the if wishes were horses stable. It’s enough to make you want to take a very long nap or finally learn the lesson that keeps coming back again and again, from different angles, taught by different teachers but always the same. – there is no need to look elsewhere, it’s all here, now, keep it simple, small is better. The more we stay in the present, focus on the task at hand, learn to calm the mind and soothe our energy and take pride and joy in the small acts and moments that make up our lives, the more the bigger picture changes too.
My coaching teacher said we are holographic beings and that, as with a hologram, taking a slice of any part of it, contains all the information contained in the whole. A strand of hair contains your DNA as does every other part of you, no matter how tiny.
When we eat well and work out, we feel and look good. We’re more likely to dress well, strut our stuff and enter into new experiences and relationships with greater confidence. Other parts of our lives start feeling and looking better too.
There is great power in doing one small thing, doing it well and opening the locks (as in the Panama canal) so the benefits gained in one place ooze here, there and everywhere.

It’s a Peace is Every Step approach to life and, as I see it, a spiritual truth, organizational wisdom and a recommendation for how to live.

Remembering, as Sivananda said, that the secret of success is to put your heart, mind and soul into even your smallest acts – what small act will you put your heart, mind and soul into today?: playing with a child, mopping the floor, balancing your check book, working in the garden, practicing scales, writing a letter, making a sale, cooking a meal or holding the hand of someone you love – try putting your heart, mind and soul into it and see what happens. May success be yours always.

I had the good fortune to spend a couple of weeks in my other version of paradise this summer: a little island in the middle of a lake in northwestern Maine.  For the past 16 years I’ve been gathering with friends from far and wide.  We are connected by threads woven in intricate and colorful patterns over the past 30 plus years. When the weather grows still and hot in St. Thomas, I start to dream of diving into the cold lake, sitting around a campfire playing music and hugging people I haven’t seen for a year or years, as the case may be.

I recharged, paddle-boarded in fresh water, listened to the call of loons, walked barefoot on mossy, pine needled covered trails through the woods and caught up on the lives of my friends.

As I filled folks in on my life over the past couple of years, I was treated to their stories.  The following tale made a big impression on me. It was told by a woman I  always look forward to seeing. She arrives with coolers and bags filled with produce and edible flowers from her abundant gardens. Her contribution is always the prettiest and the most floral: a gorgeous salad decorated with nasturtiums and she’s known for her colorful scarves and for her dancing.

I’d heard that her long-term partner had taken his leave while she was off on a trip over the winter. She’d come home to find a note saying he’d met someone else and moved out. Since she seemed pretty happy, I asked how she had handled such a shock and a loss. She admitted she’d been devastated and had retired to a girlfriend’s house for a month, waking up each morning with a heavy heart and crying herself to sleep at night.

When she finally went home, she woke up one morning and looked outside at the line of pine trees that rimmed one of her many garden plots – trees that had been a source of conflict between her and her ex. She’d wanted to cut them down and have them milled for building boards and he wasn’t in a rush and didn’t want them milled for boards so they never did anything with them.

She marched into the garage and picked up her chain saw. She chopped down all 18 trees, one right after the other. She felt great. She called the mill and arranged for the trees to be cut into pine boards. That did it. From that moment on she said she was over him. She laughed telling me about a note she got from a friend, “So that’s how Maine women get over heart-break – with a chain saw?” By picking up that saw she picked up the reins of her life and was liberated.

I’m adding this story to my collection about how people get over loss and heartbreak in their own unique and often unexpected ways. When my relationship ended, I dove into painting my house bright happy colors and I did it all myself. She chopped down trees. Other people have taken action in unique ways that channeled their energy and dark emotions into something positive and personal that had the effect of changing the channel, opening doors and letting in a big burst of fresh air.

There are stories that don’t have such happy endings. There is the violent rage of hurt and jealousy that can do untold damage to all involved. There is wallowing and watching the same movie over and over unable or unwilling to watch another film or consider that there is another story waiting to be written and lived and staying stuck instead.

As deliberate creators we are all authors of our own stories and if we don’t like the one we are living or the role we are playing, we can change it and that’s what interests me most.

If you have a story about getting over someone or something that transformed you in surprising and unexpected ways, I’d love to hear about it and so would everyone else who is struggling to rewrite his or her scripts, forgive, heal and move forward.

I was in Portland Maine, on my last night before returning to St. Thomas, when a phone call from home left me sobbing and gasping in shock at the news that a freak accident had taken the life of Roxy, my beloved 13-year-old poodle. I was inconsolable.  I’d been carrying around a little Chihuahua in Maine because she was the size of Roxy and I missed Roxy’s endless licks and joyful barks. It hit me like a ton of bricks that I would never again be greeted by her fluffy over-the-top enthusiasm and bathed in her unconditional love.

Tears flowed freely and in hiccoughs, as I went to sleep, as I woke up, on the plane the next day and as I’ve shared the news with friends, family and those who knew and loved Roxy. I stopped crying long enough to call a friend who said he’d come by early the next morning to dig a grave.

Roxy was a spunky little fur ball with a big presence, an attitude and an endless supply of wet kisses.  She was born on the pillow end of the bed where my then 10 year old daughter and I lay sleeping and has been with us ever since.  It’s hard not to picture her bounding around the corner, demanding breakfast, curling up next to me.

When things end we are reminded that everything changes, that nothing stays the same. It’s the very nature of life on the physical plane.  We get attached to people, pets, places and things, so that their loss or ending leaves a hole, a wound and we experience grief – deep to the core gut wrenching grief.  Even as we know that things change, we resist their changing and it hurts.

As I helped fill in the grave my friend had dug I talked about Roxy’s life, what an amazing dog she was and of how much I loved her.  My friend told me an animal love story about leaving home over a goat when he was 16 and never eating meat again. We shared our love of animals knowing that we are here together, all of us God’s creatures, on this precious earth.

I planted a big stand of lilies on the burial mound and added a wall of stones and shells dotted with small purple flowers and plans for more.  My daughter placed a heart shape rock on the grave and I am tending this sad, beautiful new garden with special love.

Even as I’ve kept drowning in waves of disbelief, I am aware that there are lessons here that have to do with endings, with death and with what I believe about all that.  Just a week before, I’d picked up the book Emmanuel –– a channeled question and answer session with Emmanuel, a non-physical entity who speaks through a guide. Asked about death, Emmanuel replied  ‘death is like taking off a too tight shoe”. It’s a release, liberation, being set free.

He said that our picture of death as an ending is incorrect and the best is yet to come. We continue to exist just in a different, more expansive energetic form.

I’m exploring and learning about death and the transition that Roxy made and that we all get to make. I’m listening, learning and being guided to find and live the answers to my questions.

Carpe Diem is the other message I get loud and clear: seize the day, love the one you’re with, be here now, tell it like it is, tap into the power of now and enjoy every sandwich.

As I continue to mourn Roxy, it feels right to sob out all those tears so I can change the channel and focus on how lucky I got to spend a whole 13 years with such a fabulous creature and to celebrating Roxy. What a joyous long term cross species co-creative relationship and an endless source of unconditional love it was!

My sister said that she’s had a couple of Roxy ‘sightings’ just as she said that our father appeared to her a few times shortly after he passed away.  She said Roxy’s doing great, barking away and jumping up and down.

Since all dogs go to heaven, expect to be licked all over and greeted with wild exuberance and much fanfare by my beloved Roxy (1999-2012) when you make your appearance.